It�s blood drive week here at College University, a time for us to give freely of that red liquid of life. Well, some of us anyway.

The kids from the Red Cross drove their big buses in last night and set up shop. They�ve got a museum bus chronicling the history of the organization, they�re taking donations at the union, and they�re giving inspirational and/or informative speeches at the amphitheater. Good for them. It�s important to get the word out, because there is a severe shortage of blood in this area. I applaud the Red Cross for their blood collecting efforts over the past hundred million years. Really. I mean, someone�s got to do it.

Even I got swept up into the spirit of needle-sticking and skipped over to the sub to fill out the necessary paperwork. I signed my name on the list and perused the donor eligibility guidelines. And that�s when I got upset.

I know, this happened to Kirk Read. I read it in his book, but that was in the '80s and this is 2003. Surely they�d have done away with such ridiculous, antiquated guidelines by now. Unfortunately, they hadn�t. There it was, halfway down the page:

"Those who are at increased risk for becoming infected with HIV are not eligible to donate blood. According to the Food and Drug Administration, you are at increased risk if you are a male who has had sex with another male since 1977, even once."

I double- and triple-checked with the blood donation staff to make sure I was reading it right. The consensus was that I am in fact ineligible to give blood because I�m gay.

Wow. This, I think, is the first blatant act of anti-gay discrimination I have faced since, well, ever. I can�t give blood because the fact that I have sex with boys means I might possibly be at an increased risk for HIV.

Doesn�t the Red Cross read? HIV/AIDS is not just a gay disease. Heteros are just as likely to contract it from each other. I could understand a screening question along the lines of "Have you had unprotected sex with anyone in the last year or since 1977 or since the Ming Dynasty?" That�s an objective question that each donor can be asked.

I feel the need to point out that this is a very specific and segmented discrimination. First, gay men who are sexually active are prohibited from giving blood, but lesbians can donate until they pass out. Also, if you�ve been celibate since 1977 (and honestly, who has), they�ll still take your blood.

I just keep coming back to the fact that I, as a minority, am being discriminated against because of something someone thinks I might be more likely to have than the average person. That�s like not accepting blood from African Americans because they�re at a higher risk for sickle-cell anemia. It�s wrong.

As I walked by the amphitheater I caught a portion of one of the speeches. The man was going on and on about how there�s a severe shortage of blood in local blood banks and that most donors only give once a year. He explained that the qualifications for blood donation were simple: be age seventeen or older and weigh more than 110 pounds. I wanted very much to scream out, "And you have to be straight!" but I somehow managed to contain myself. Good for me, I guess.

I want to go back there and raise hell, find out why the Red Cross insists on living in the past and propagating fear. I went out of my way to do a nice thing, to save a life, according to the literature, but they didn�t want my blood. I wasn�t good enough, normal enough for them. If they want, I�ll take them my most recent HIV test results (negative, by the way). I don�t think it�ll do much good, though. Even with a blood crisis, they won�t change their tune. For a group whose fundamental principles include humanity, impartiality, and unity, they certainly have some inhuman, partial, de-unifying policies.

Whatever, Elizabeth Dole. I�d write you an angry letter, but in reality Bob Dole is probably punishment enough.

Someone got here by searching for: "Homosexuals have a shorter lifespan." Goddammit, no they don't! What the hell is wrong with you people? Reading: Lucky You by Carl Hiaasen. Watching: The SNLfest tape from 2002. Listening to: The new BNL single, "Another Postcard." Eating: My grandma's awesome cookies. Thanks, grandma. Drinking: Anything and everything, because the all-water diet is officially over. Thank Jebus!